All children—that’s you and me—long for the approval of their parents . . . especially their fathers. It’s a longing that never goes away. It gets buried or transferred to other relationships, but it’s there. And we underestimate its power. Every parent wants to be approved by his or her child—to be a hero, to hear, “when I grow up I want to be just like you.” As that desire grows, so does a parent’s insecurity.
Buried beneath the hurt, disappointment, distance, or silence is a desire to be connected to our children and our fathers. It lasts a lifetime.